scratching my head...

reaching the point in my life where a decision has to be made. My rap career, or attempt at one, has handed me lots of frustration that far exceeds its pleasure. I fight with thoughts everyday. Some negative, some positive but they all lead me to the same question, why? Why do I continue. With no hope of ever being heard I put my all into every song, beat I generate. Still stuck at zero, no sales, no followers, no stories to tell my sons when their older. Nothing but self satisfaction, kinda like masturbating the end result is the same but there is just something missing! Ha ha ha, you laugh but I'm dead ass. So I sit here up all night mastering a craft for which I will probably never be compensated for and waste my life away. But at least I'm happy you say, but no I am not. I can't remember the last time I've had a side splitting laugh or a sincere smile, that's me Mr. Mundane. Not to say that my life, my sons, my wife don't make me happy but every time I think about the things we can't have, it all falls down.

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I have decided to take a road trip to new orleans in just a few short weeks, yes i have subjected nyself to 1300 miles of torture but whAT the hell
it will make for some good stories! i am taking
suggestions on playlist selections for the trip!
happy mardi gras